Strategy for fed up wives.

I usually do not target my audience by gender.

And no, this is not a tirade against the male sex.

So, please no hate comments!

Unless they are really interesting.

  Strategy for fed up wives of dumb butt husbands.

Today on Twitter I noticed two husbands discussing how they have “Selective hearing” when it comes to their wives.

For years women have turned to the popular, but always failing “Silent treatment” after such a display of uncouth male behavior.

Ladies!  Don’t you realize you are giving them what they want?

They realize you are going to talk again sometime, so they might as well enjoy the quiet now.

Instead, try this  strategy, the next time your husband is in the mood:

“Sex?  Sorry hubby  I didn’t hear you!  Let’s talk about our feelings.”

He is going to try and talk to you, because he figures no talking- no sex.

Then there is the perplexing question of just why a man would spend more energy and time avoiding a chore than it would take time and energy to complete it?

Sorry, I have no answers for this one, but I do have some strategy for you frustrated wives.

First mistake you can ever make is to believe they are as dumb as they pretend to be.

Yeah, I know the evidence is staggering and it makes little sense to us why anyone would want to appear to be such a dumb butt, but I am telling you if you give in to the dumb routine you will never get anywhere.

I have a theory:

In the Pre-women’s right movement era it was the women who pretended to be dumb to get their own way.

Finally sick of pretending to be complete airheads, women logically concluded that they could do things for and by themselves.

Now, this left man without his accustomed role of provider/ hero and lowered the expectations women had of his abilities.

Somehow, men had to regain some kind of foothold, so in a reversal of pre-1970’s sexual politics,  the men took on the dumb role  to get out of  any  unpleasant chores  and  to leave more time for far more important pursuits like gaming or television watching.

This is an actyou don’t believe me?

Well, think about this, at work does he act like a dumb butt? (This may not apply to males under the age of 21) –  No? Why?-because it would not serve his ego.

At work he a gets to retain his hero status. (He single-handedly saved the whole company by being  such a competent employee.)

He also still gets to enjoy his provider role, because he figures he is bringing in some of the income, and acting like a dumb butt( he has learned)  is a sure way to get fired.

Now, I hope the light bulb is starting to click on and I suppose your tendency would be to get mad and start nagging.

Try hard to resist that urge.

The way the male brain is wired is that he will interpret any  nagging as  justification that  will automatically cancel out any obligatory sense of duty he might have otherwise felt to contribute to the household chores.

The more you nag, no matter how much the dumb butt husband deserves it, the more stubborn he will become and go to increasingly bizarre lengths to get out of whatever you are nagging him to do.

Let’s just say the kitchen sink needs to be fixed, you have tried nagging, scolding, and begging-none of it has worked so far.

One of the techniques  a husband may employ is to pretend he doesn’t have the right tools to fix the sink and has to go to the hardware store.

Whatever you do –do not let him go alone!

Jump in to the car/truck like an Olympic sprinter, before he has a chance to drive off or he will be gone for hours and will return with nothing.

Make sure you chat all the way to the store and make sure it is not remotely interesting to him in anyway-talk about the new dress you bought, the chick flick you are longing to see, or the kids grades.

Make sure to go in to the store with him and stick to him like glue while you continue to chatter away.

You should employ the same tactic on the ride home .

Now, many husbands will just go ahead and fix that sink hoping you will shut the heck up, and it would be to your advantage to do so  or you will have gained nothing.

This is called imprinting and he will begin, eventually, (be patient) to realize that if he just does the job at hand then the chattering will cease.

This might take lowering your pride just a bit, but you will have to decide whether you want to make your point or get the dang sink fixed!

Unfortunately, if you do decide that making your point is the more important, be aware he has already tuned you out a couple of hours ago.

Now, some husbands will try and employ another technique- actually starting the job, but messing the job up so badly hoping  you will never ask him to do anything ever again.

That’s okay- do not get mad, instead suggest you hire a plumber and then suggest that watching a hot sweaty man work on a sink gets you excited.

He will want to be that hot sweaty man and will fix the sink.

You will probably have to put up with him constantly drawing your attention his awesome pipe fitting skills, don’t get annoyed,  this is his way to alert you to the fact his testosterone levels are rising. (Much like a male bird showing his plumage in a mating ritual)

On a cautionary note, ladies, if you employ this last tactic make sure you are prepared to back it up.

You can not dangle a carrot forever (your cleavage in this case)  in front of his eyes and then expect that the horse (a man in this case) will not, eventually, want to taste the carrot.




I am me and nobody else. One of a kind just like the rest of the world.

9 thoughts on “Strategy for fed up wives.

  1. Of course, playing dumb can be useful. I’ve been married nearly 24 years, and my husband still does all the laundry, because he says, I “don’t do it right.” He bases this on when we were young college students, and I was so poor, I washed all my clothes together, but on cold to avoid bleeding of the colors. I couldn’t afford to separate them into different loads (that’s back when I went to the laundromat). Of course, I’d never do that now, but what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him. And it saves me from doing the laundry. 🙂

    I realize this is counter to the point you were making about men, but in this situation, I can relate. 🙂

    1. Hey, whatever works! 😉 If I could get out of laundry…hmm…I could tell Paul watching him wash, fold, and put away the laundry get’s me in the mood? -Worth a try?
      All is fair in love and laundry, is it not? 🙂

      1. It is, indeed. Especially when one considers I pretty much do all of the other household chores. And manage all things electronic, which is no small task. 🙂

      2. I figure the strategy is a win-win situation! 🙂 But,of course if needed (A girl is got to get her rest sometimes) once the last article of clothing is folded and put away feigning a headache may come in handy.

    1. Thank you for being brave enough to admit it and heck, the first and the last strategies do bring their own rewards! 😉

  2. My husband is driving me INSANE with his baby ways. I’m literally at wits end with him. Why must we have to remind them 3 times in ONE hour that they need to do something, Oh and remind them again before bed. Only to get up the next morning and find it STILL not done?! I’m seriously thinking about drawing him a flipping picture!! And what really takes the cake is his saying “Don’t treat me like a kid or like I’m stupid”…..All I can say to that is “If the shoe fits then lace that sucker up and wear it!!”. UGH!!!

    1. Being driven crazy could not be much fun. Just remember the bit about the carrot. Try telling him that whatever chore he needs to do, that watching him makes you hot. Like: “Watching you fold clothes makes me so hot”, you may never have to remind him again! 😉

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