I usually do not target my audience by gender.
And no, this is not a tirade against the male sex.
So, please no hate comments!
Unless they are really interesting.
Strategy for fed up wives of dumb butt husbands.
Today on Twitter I noticed two husbands discussing how they have “Selective hearing” when it comes to their wives.
For years women have turned to the popular, but always failing “Silent treatment” after such a display of uncouth male behavior.
Ladies! Don’t you realize you are giving them what they want?
They realize you are going to talk again sometime, so they might as well enjoy the quiet now.
Instead, try this strategy, the next time your husband is in the mood:
“Sex? Sorry hubby I didn’t hear you! Let’s talk about our feelings.”
He is going to try and talk to you, because he figures no talking- no sex.
Then there is the perplexing question of just why a man would spend more energy and time avoiding a chore than it would take time and energy to complete it?
Sorry, I have no answers for this one, but I do have some strategy for you frustrated wives.
First mistake you can ever make is to believe they are as dumb as they pretend to be.
Yeah, I know the evidence is staggering and it makes little sense to us why anyone would want to appear to be such a dumb butt, but I am telling you if you give in to the dumb routine you will never get anywhere.
I have a theory:
In the Pre-women’s right movement era it was the women who pretended to be dumb to get their own way.
Finally sick of pretending to be complete airheads, women logically concluded that they could do things for and by themselves.
Now, this left man without his accustomed role of provider/ hero and lowered the expectations women had of his abilities.
Somehow, men had to regain some kind of foothold, so in a reversal of pre-1970’s sexual politics, the men took on the dumb role to get out of any unpleasant chores and to leave more time for far more important pursuits like gaming or television watching.
This is an act– you don’t believe me?
Well, think about this, at work does he act like a dumb butt? (This may not apply to males under the age of 21) – No? Why?-because it would not serve his ego.
At work he a gets to retain his hero status. (He single-handedly saved the whole company by being such a competent employee.)
He also still gets to enjoy his provider role, because he figures he is bringing in some of the income, and acting like a dumb butt( he has learned) is a sure way to get fired.
Now, I hope the light bulb is starting to click on and I suppose your tendency would be to get mad and start nagging.
Try hard to resist that urge.
The way the male brain is wired is that he will interpret any nagging as justification that will automatically cancel out any obligatory sense of duty he might have otherwise felt to contribute to the household chores.
The more you nag, no matter how much the dumb butt husband deserves it, the more stubborn he will become and go to increasingly bizarre lengths to get out of whatever you are nagging him to do.
Let’s just say the kitchen sink needs to be fixed, you have tried nagging, scolding, and begging-none of it has worked so far.
One of the techniques a husband may employ is to pretend he doesn’t have the right tools to fix the sink and has to go to the hardware store.
Whatever you do –do not let him go alone!
Jump in to the car/truck like an Olympic sprinter, before he has a chance to drive off or he will be gone for hours and will return with nothing.
Make sure you chat all the way to the store and make sure it is not remotely interesting to him in anyway-talk about the new dress you bought, the chick flick you are longing to see, or the kids grades.
Make sure to go in to the store with him and stick to him like glue while you continue to chatter away.
You should employ the same tactic on the ride home .
Now, many husbands will just go ahead and fix that sink hoping you will shut the heck up, and it would be to your advantage to do so or you will have gained nothing.
This is called imprinting and he will begin, eventually, (be patient) to realize that if he just does the job at hand then the chattering will cease.
This might take lowering your pride just a bit, but you will have to decide whether you want to make your point or get the dang sink fixed!
Unfortunately, if you do decide that making your point is the more important, be aware he has already tuned you out a couple of hours ago.
Now, some husbands will try and employ another technique- actually starting the job, but messing the job up so badly hoping you will never ask him to do anything ever again.
That’s okay- do not get mad, instead suggest you hire a plumber and then suggest that watching a hot sweaty man work on a sink gets you excited.
He will want to be that hot sweaty man and will fix the sink.
You will probably have to put up with him constantly drawing your attention his awesome pipe fitting skills, don’t get annoyed, this is his way to alert you to the fact his testosterone levels are rising. (Much like a male bird showing his plumage in a mating ritual)
On a cautionary note, ladies, if you employ this last tactic make sure you are prepared to back it up.
You can not dangle a carrot forever (your cleavage in this case) in front of his eyes and then expect that the horse (a man in this case) will not, eventually, want to taste the carrot.